Sunday, May 11, 2014
Why Am I An Energy Healer?
I live and work in an environment where energy healing is common. Yet a question that often comes to me is: why did you become an energy healer? I cannot address this question without digging a little into my personal history. As a child, I suffered severe physical, emotional and sexual abuse from members of my family, including my own mother. Although I tried conventional therapy for several years after graduating college and did find it useful, there was often a sense of something inside me that still was unhealed. No matter how much therapy I did, nor how many modes of therapy I tried, I still felt like a part of me was unclean and unhealed.
Once I became initiated into Reiki, and also began investigating other energetic modes of healing, I heard about concepts that never arose in my therapy sessions. Some teachers would talk about the energetic cords that exist between people, and show techniques of how to clear these cords. Also, I began to have a greater understanding of the karmic conditioning that can be created in a person’s energy field, as well as how to release that conditioning.
I began working with Reiki and other energetic techniques to clear the energy cords between me and those members of my family who abused me when I was a child. These energetic clearings sometimes involved higher level Reiki symbols, sending energy backwards in time, and other concepts that again were outside the box of traditional therapy. Over time, by using these techniques repeatedly, I began to feel clean, and the cloud of shame and unworthiness that I had felt most of my life began to disappear.
The work I did was so dramatic that in September of 2004 I was able eventually to return to the home where I once lived, the place where most of my abuse occurred, without it negatively impacting me. It was just a short visit, after a seven day energy healing training in Santa Fe, New Mexico. I almost didn’t go to the training, because I was afraid of experiencing the migraine headaches I was accustomed to whenever being near the place I grew up in Albuquerque, New Mexico. But, on the advice of my teacher, a wonderful healer named Alexandra Marquardt, I went ahead with the training. Midway through the training I felt a cloud lift out of my karmic body from the work we were doing. The cloud felt like a puff of yellow smoke floating out of my spine through my crown chakra at the top of my head. In that moment, I knew I could return to the house I had grown up in without any trauma returning to me. When the training ended, I asked a friend to drive me to Albuquerque so I could visit the home where I had grown up. I did so, and felt no sadness, no pain, no trauma at all, as if the energy cords between me and all who had harmed me were now clear, as were the energetic imprints left upon the house and the land. I felt free, truly free in a way I thought I never would.
I give thanks to all the energy healers who have been part of my journey, some of whom were Reiki Masters, and others who were shamans and other adept energetic healers. Today when people ask me why I am an energy healer, the answer is that it is through energy healing that I was able to free that child who had been buried inside of me. Although therapy helped on some levels, it was through clearing the deeper energetic layers of my psyche, clearing those energetic hooks and cords between me and my abusers, and eventually clearing the actual space where the abuse occurred that allowed me to actually become free. So, that is why I am an energy healer, because it has given me the gift of freedom, the emotional freedom, physical freedom and spiritual freedom to no longer be chained to my past.